TRUE FEARLESSNESS: 7.11

As Memorial Day weekend comes to an end I cannot stop thinking about the dedication that my father provided for our country almost 33 years ago on July 11, 1976 on the USS New Orleans. My father, Sgt. Major Charles Frazier, Sr., is a Vietnam War Veteran and served 30 years in the U.S. Marine Corps during highly turbulent times. Throughout his tenure in the service he experienced many things. All the while he was one of those men who humbly did what his country asked and performed it with excellence.

One of the major challenges my father faced as an African American male was racial conflict. It was until a few years ago where my aunt informed me of the magnitude of my father’s impact while in the Corps. Since I can remember my father has always had dentures. Whenever I asked him he always evaded the topic so I just assumed that it occurred during the Vietnam War and that he simply didn’t want to discuss it.

My aunt informed me that while on his cruiser he attempted to stop a race riot between the African American soldiers and the Caucasian soldiers. As a result the African American soldiers thought that he was wrong for trying to stop the fight, and then proceeded to “jump” him in the mess hall.

In my father and another Caucasian soldier’s attempt to stop the race riot, my father’s jaw was broken by the only chair on the ship that happened to not be nailed down. Although my father was severely injured during the riot, he made a decision to not only stand for what was right, he stayed true to his commitment to his country for many years after the incident.

One of things that I always noticed about my father that he has always been a man of a few words; real down to earth, but had an uncanny sense of humor. I also remember being around 10 years old walking out of the PX with him and one of his soldiers stopping us. As they talked I tried to ignore them both as they discussed “adult stuff”, and I was just concerned about getting home to get outside and play. His soldier then turned to me and said, “You are very lucky to have a father like him.” In my 10 year-old mind, “I was like okay…I guess.” And then he made the statement that has always resonated with me, “Your father is a good man. You hear me? Your father is a good man.” For many years I wondered what he meant by that statement.

As a teenager and a young adult I struggled to agree with that statement for various reasons that were going on in my L.I.F.E: past hurts, my stubbornness, learning things the hard way, etc. But now, I KNOW exactly what his soldier meant by that statement. As you keep living, you continue to learn what makes up the fabric of a man. You learn what it truly means to live FEARLESSLY. I think about how my father made a courageous decision on 7.11 to stand for truth. He is not only a good man, but a great man! As a result, we honor a deserving RUN4LIFE youth each month during summer programming with the 7.11 Award to honor them (and my father) for their fearless efforts and leadership.

Thanks pops for being fearless! I’m proud to be your son ;)!

4 L.I.F.E.!

BE Still...

The last few swim practices have truly been L.I.F.E. changing sessions and helped me a lot with how I approach not only swimming but my L.I.F.E. To Live In Full Expectation only means to live one way: FEARLESSLY. For me that simply means identifying my fears or things that may provoke some anxiety, embrace how I feel, and do it anyway. F.E.A.R. is an immobilizing force. That word F.E.A.R. is very tricky! It simply means False Evidence Appearing to be Real! It can literally stop people in their tracks from them accomplishing their goals and dreams. It can manifest itself through so many different ways: self-sabotage, excuses, etc.

Because I am challenging my youth & staff to live FEARLESSLY, it’s only right that the bar I have for myself is even higher. As I train for the 2009 Ironman Wisconsin, it has been a L.I.F.E.long dream to cross that infamous finish and to be declared an Ironman! As a kid, I remember sitting in front of the television watching the Hawaii Ironman and seeing Dave Scott & Scott Tinley competing for the title several times. I asked my dad, “Dad, how come no black people are out there swimming?” My dad, being his comedic self, said, “Boy, you know black people don’t swim.” As we both laughed he said, “If you want to do it, then DO IT.” I’ve taken those words and applied them to my L.I.F.E. in all capacities. And NOW the opportunity is presenting itself.

Although this is one of my L.I.F.E. Dreams it doesn’t excuse any anxieties or fears that I may possess:). For those that know me, swimming long distances has been challenge for me. But what is L.I.F.E. without a few F.E.A.R.’s to keep you on track? Swimming 2.4 miles is not the easiest thing to do in any capacity, but it’s another step closer of me achieving my goal of crossing that finish line, and giving up is not an option.

But back to my original point of my swimming practices, the last two practices our coach has made us swim with our eyes closed. I’m like…”just swimming all the mileage is difficult as it is, but now close our eyes!” LoL…But in the moments of closing my eyes I realized that if I just can BE still, relax my mind and allow the technique to carry me I will be okay. You may ask, “How can you BE still, when you’re moving?”

BE still and flow with the water. Once I relaxed and I breathed I was able to clear my mind and flowed with the water. Even though my eyes were closed, I was still able to see and know where I was going. Okay, I still ran into the lane ropes, but you get my point…lol Having the willingness to confront your F.E.A.R.’s (swimming with your eyes closed), embrace the F.E.A.R., and BEing still allows you to go with the flow, and ultimately be successful. This is a metaphor for L.I.F.E.!

No matter what you are facing: an IronMan, a L.I.F.E. struggle, living a healthier L.I.F.E.style, working in the field of your choice, dealing with the recession…just identify your F.E.A.R.’s, size them up, and then just BE still and watch yourself come alive…

Bruce Lee said it best,

“Empty your mind
Become formless, shapeless
Like water
Put water in a cup, it becomes the cup
Put water into a bottle, it becomes the bottle
Put water into a teapot, it becomes the teapot
Now water can flow or it can crash
Be like water my friend”

4 L.I.F.E.!

IN-JOY L.I.F.E.!

What’s up my good people?! Do you remember the days when you could run around during recess without a care in the world? You weren’t concerned about the recession, bills, gas rates, if you were going to be on time to this or that meeting, all that “grown folk” stuff…lol What happens to us along the way that makes us become stiff, jaded, and sometimes bitter adults? What changes us? Some might say, “Life happens.”

Today I closed my eyes and was immediately a child again. While sitting outside watching my students participate in recess I heard the laughs. I felt the joy. Nothing could distract from this moment. It was a WOW moment! To add more laughter to the moment, one of the kids said, “Mr. Mike, I can’t sit out here another minute.” I looked to him stretched my arms to the sky, smiled, and responded with, “Can you honestly say you do not want to be out here (outside)?”

The student earnestly turned and looked me in my eyes and said, “Mr. Mike, I do not want to spend another minute out here.” I almost fell to the ground laughing because he was so serious, and he simply answered my question. Kids say the “darndest things”, usually the truth, and we just don’t want to hear it. But today this child’s truth was indicative of so many adults and many sedentary children in our culture. He did not want to IN-JOY nature or the moment. While other children were walking, running, laughing, playing, acting, singing, etc., he was sitting like a bump on a log COMPLAINING! He was concerned about getting back inside and doing exactly, totally, a big bunch of NOTHING! LoL

And the irony of it all was that I chased him back inside the school, and we zig-zagged & laughed the entire way both returning back to the classroom happier than before we came outside!

Now that’s TRUE L.I.F.E.!

4 L.I.F.E.!

Mike:)

How Do You See Your L.I.F.E.?

This past winter we had the AWEsome privilege of working with four adolescents with RUN4LIFE’s We Run the C.I.T.Y. Initiative with Douglas County School. From December until May I have met with these youth hoping to sow seeds where they begin to learn how to take responsibility for their lives, increase their self-confidence, and ultimate begin to live a healthier L.I.F.E. This session we were training the youth to run in the 2009 Georgia ING Half-Marathon.

In order for the teens to qualify for the race they were expected to follow certain expectations throughout the race. When dealing with teens you already know that you will have to implement second, third, fourth, and numerous chances for them to follow directions/expectations.

My issue this season was not having to constantly remind the teens of the expectations, but their attitude during the process. All of them possessed a sense of entitlement as if RUN4LIFE and the world were supposed to GIVE them everything, rather than work for it themselves. Along with their sense of entitlement they possessed a very ungrateful attitude for individuals attempting to impact their lives. Some of the expectations for the youth were to: maintain a certain GPA, dress for success every Thursday, avoid any legal trouble, and participate in programming.

Unfortunately the four teens did not make it to the starting line. I realized that the four youth represent four types of individuals in our society: 1. The person that talks a great game, but doesn’t back it up with action. 2. The person that is scared to take action and will not show up to a challenge and masks it with excuses. 3. The person that blames everyone else for their inability to follow through. 4. And the person that once they have the opportunity for success sabotages it, and then blames someone else for their lack of planning.

Although the youth were not able to run in the ING Half-Marathon they were all given an opportunity to run in the Big Peach 5K. One youth was able to run in the race. All he had to do was show up at the school to be transported to the race. But the youth did not show up to the race. He did not show up after being provided four months of instruction, training, and support from teachers and staff. When asked for his reason in not showing up his story changed four times, and in essence sabotaged another opportunity to make history in his L.I.F.E.

Initially I was frustrated about this youth not taking responsibility for his actions, but then I realized that this L.I.F.E. lesson will continue to present itself to him, and that is up to him to learn or not learn form that lesson. It’s not my job to make him see it. My only goal & ultimate challenge is for him to hopefully see his L.I.F.E. in a different way.

If I can emPOWER this youth to come alive to his own L.I.F.E., RUN4LIFE will have accomplished its mission. So many youth (and adults) have been taught to run from their truth rather than stand there and simply embrace it, and then move through it. RUN4LIFE is THE metaphor for L.I.F.E. When it gets tough and challenging being able to admit to yourself, “I am scared, nervous, etc.” It is okay to be scared, but then what do you do with your fear. Once you have identified that feeling breathe in and then begin to move forward and breathe out realizing that you are making progress. In that breath you forge the strength to simply BE. And that is your only responsibility to BE there, in that moment.

Although these four youth did not make it to the starting line, two other teens represent another type of person. The individuals who are not being recognized, but are diligently working on their own for their opportunity for success back in the corner where no one can see them. These two Boys & Girls Club teens were prepared and ready to step in for the ING Half-Marathon, and successfully crossed the finished line on March 29^th.

It was an honor to work with these youth for the past four months. But it was even more humbling and beautiful that I could run 13.1 miles and have a two and a half hour therapy session with two teens discussing everything from T.I., President Obama, and Michael Vick and having the opportunity to take them by the King Center for the first time.

Now that is TRUE L.I.F.E.!

4 L.I.F.E.!